Slimming World Secrets

I just gained 10½lbs – in a week!

Oooooh, deary me. That old self-destruct button has been well and truly SLAMMED this past week. I’ve had one of my largest ever gains – and I completely deserve it.

To be honest, I’ve not been sticking to the plan 100% for the past month or so. Three times now I’ve averaged more than double my maximum daily Syns. The first time, I got away with it. The second time, I had a tummy bug and couldn’t eat a thing for three days.

But karma has well and truly bitten me on the ass and it’s a case of third time unlucky. This time last week, I wrote that I was 4lbs away from Target and wanted to get there within four weeks.

I’m now over a stone away from that, so any hopes of hitting Target in the next month are well and truly over.

Giggle juice and takeaway pizza

So what made me self-destruct? Well, as I said last week, I’ve had a couple of bits of crappy news to deal with – one I won’t go into here and the other being the death of my auntie.

Added to that, we had a bank holiday weekend of absolutely glorious weather. After being cooped up in the house for so long during a winter of lockdown, it was amazing to get out and see people – and share a glass of giggle juice or three.

But, instead of doing this once – I try to stick to drinking once a week – I did it five times! There was also a massive 12-inch takeaway meat feast pizza consumed last night.

And a 10-inch garlic bread.

With cheese.

Scoffed the lot. I can self-destruct like nobody else.

The end of naked weigh-ins

I got on the scales this morning fully expecting a massive gain, and I wasn’t disappointed. Well, I was, but you know what I mean.

To be fair, a good chunk of that gain would have been pizza baby. That deep-pan doughy base sits pretty heavy for a while.

I didn’t go silly with the drink last night as it was a school night, but I woke up feeling incredibly dehydrated – probably from all the salt in the pizza and garlic bread.

So I must have drunk at least two pints of water before I weighed myself. Also, I’ve been weighing myself naked during lockdown.

I figured, since it would be a big self-destruct gain anyway, and I’m joining a new (physical) group in a couple of weeks’ time, I might as well stick some clothes on for my last two virtual weigh-ins.

That way, I hopefully won’t get a shock when I step on the jet black square of the Slimming World scales of justice when I join my new group.

So with the water, the barely digested pizza and the clothes, that probably accounts for about half my gain.

Dismay turns to determination

Even though I knew the number on the scales would be a big one – and it was a whopper – I was really disappointed in myself. I was 4lbs from Target and I blew it.

When filling in the form for my consultant, in the bit where it asks for my plan for the week ahead, I wrote: “Throw self off mill lift tower.” I was jesting, of course.

But, ya know what? I’m not going to beat myself up about this. I’m only human, I’ve been in this position before and I’ll probably be here again.

I could’ve got down and beat myself up, saying that it took me four years to get back close to Target range after the last time I was almost there in 2017.

But what good would that do? All that negativity would mean only one thing: saying f*ck it, and then putting several stones back on, as I did in 2019.

I aim to lose 7lbs in seven days

Despite this massive self-destruct gain, I’m not that person anymore, and I know that, if I stick rigidly to plan over the next seven days, I can probably shift more than half a stone of that gain.

So that’s what I’m going to do. I’ve drawn the line already in my head, and I’ve had an angelic day, eating fresh fruit for breakfast and making a kick-ass mackerel pâté for lunch. Ask me if you want the recipe – it’s dead easy, dead tasty and turns out at half a Syn for loads.

I’ll probably have my usual apres-group dinner of Slimming World chips with froached eggs and cheesy (HEA) baked beans. Not exactly a Speed-fest, but it feels like a treat despite being Syn-free.

So that’ll be me ending the day on a grand total of half a Syn. I always start the week as I mean to go on – it’s just the weekends that get me, especially when they’re extra long, extra sunny ones.

Speed, step and SP

Other changes: I’m going to up my Speed food intake, as that’s been a bit low the past fortnight or so. I’m going to up my Body Magic, as I’ve neglected my step aerobics over the same period. And I’ll get some SP days in, too.

In short, I’m gonna do what I should be doing: stop dicking around and stick to the bloody plan. I know it works – my hard work in 2020 and 2021 prove that. But as soon as you start only half following it, it stops working. Funny, that, eh?